Day 4– I want to be making zucchini fritters…yep, today I am going Vegetarian and writing about the attachments I have that I desperately need to let go of. All while sticking with my commitment of blogging The Yoga Sutras for 7 days straight.

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Hello readers! Did you know there is a huge health difference in crying vs. weeping?

It’s day 4 of my exercise of noticing Aparigraha in my life. Aparigraha, as we know by now, and explained more on Day 1, is one of the Yamas as written by Patanjali. Yamas are rules of social behavior. The Niyamas are all about our personal behavior. Together the Yamas and Niyamas make up 2 of the 8 limbs of Yoga. You can learn all about them in The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali. The translation that I have read, a few times now, is by Allistair Shearer. A quick reminder though… Aparigraha is about coveting things that others have, being envious or jealous, and most of all, attached to things. Here I am sharing how I see myself doing just that.

So what are the yoga sutras? They are truths about yoga, about union, about life. Life truths. Sutra means to stitch together. I like to think of it as truths woven together like what we bloggers do. We get vulnerable, write about our truths for the whole world to see and we stitch them together with words, poetry, images and more. If only every reader was able to keep in mind that most of what we write are our own truths. I like to remind people of that, and also that my truths may not be yours. I’m not for everyone, nor should I be, or want to be. Be you. Live your truths. I hope my writing, in some small way, helps lead you to yours.

Here is a truth… I am REALLY hungry! Like another hour and I would be hangry. I am hoping the zucchini I bought before Christmas is still good and I am about to try making zucchini fritters. I found this recipe on Pinterest… I hope you can find it. My Links haven’t been working that I can tell and I don’t know what I am doing wrong! Any advice is appreciated. This is why I made sure the pic has the bloggers info. I’ll let you know how they turn out.

Did I mention I am going Vegetarian again?

Yep, been there a few times and the longest stretch was 6 years. I don’t eat much meat anyway and now I am ready to commit. Commit to my health, the animals I love and don’t want to eat anymore, and to help the planet. Today’s blog is not about that, however I will say that Ahimsa is the first Yama, rules of ethical behavior but mostly known as non-violence. Going Vegan or Vegetarian is all about Ahimsa! I feel another blog-series coming on!

Isn’t it amazing how writing can make you forget you’re hungry? Just me? Ok…

Here we go!

Reflecting now on how I am attached to things with my children. When I use the word attached I really see how I can cling to them. I’m a parent! We cling! It’s time to let go in so many ways. My son is 14 and hitting that stage that it’s VERY clear he’s not my little man anymore, although he always will be. It’s time… they wouldn’t have rock music if all teenagers didn’t have to hit an angst stage. The pull-away-from-your-parent stage that parents hope they survive and that we can remember the 20’s will hit and most likely all we have taught them will sink in. I am very close to my kids and my kids are very close to me.

I wonder if too much attachment or closeness hinders them? I had this talk with a friend about how she and I are very succesful and we were never nurtured by parents or given anything so we earned it on our own. Does doing too much for your kids harm them? I think it can if we don’t recognize moments we need to let go and trust them.

My daughter is about to be driving and I am not ready for that. I honestly don’t feel she is ready, but the time is coming and I will have to let go and trust.

That’s what letting go is all about yes? Trusting. The most important Person to trust and maybe all we can really trust is ourselves. Read a previous blog about that here.

I do cling to love, cling to those I love. I have learned that when we cling, we lose. I am so used to losing love through death that I fear it. Hopefully recognizing that more through my recent breakup and through my current studies and growing awareness, I can learn to not covet love and allow myself to trust and let go.

I will still keep my head on though because trusting ourselves is crucial but it doesn’t make everyone worthy. Bullet dodged! 😉

Where do I attach myself to friends? I cling to what others think about me. Less and less as I get older, wiser and care less while I love myself more. Yet, it’s still there. Those fears of what others think. Ties a lot into self-doubt doesn’t it? Ew, yuck I don’t want to be attached to Self-doubt! When said like that I want to go wash all that down the drain and seriously let that shit go! Pardon my language, but if there is anything we need to be doing … it’s believing in ourself and letting go of doubt! You with me?

Wow, doubt is fear and attachment! LET. IT. GO. Aparigraha baby… we do not want to attach to things that harm us.

I am writing much more than I thought and in hindsight I wish that zucchini was draining. 😏 I might be having mashed potatoes!

Attachment when it comes to colleagues? Again it mirrors my thoughts today about clinging to my children. I really rely on my employees. Without them there doing the services they do… yikes, I would have nothing. It’s a people-based business. It’s a service industry. –So far I am keeping that separate from my blogging it’s not what I am here for– I have had a lot of turnover this year. More than ever in 19yrs of business! People stay with me, they love working with me, so this is very new to me to lose, and I have/will lose 6 full-time people out of only 25, in one year. It’s not as if I haven’t had employees come and go but I am talking about the core.

At this point though, times are changing, they have moved to other states, retired or changed careers. I have said before and I will say it again, “If you help people follow their dreams, be prepared for them to sometimes exit yours.”

<<<<<<<<<
it wasn't about me, I cling to the fear of losing them. Will I find the right employees that will come into my business? It will never be the same as the ones that have grown with me from the very beginning, so regardless, huge transformation is happening and been happening all year. It's overwhelmed me since February. Off-the-charts stressed me out!

It's all because I am clinging isn't it? All because I can't let go? All because I need to up my trust-factor. I have been working through all of this all year long.

The relationship, and the person, and the break-up, did not help matters. Such is life.

2017 has been about letting go in HUGE ways!<<<<<<<
what? I am going to honor myself and my deepest understandings of Spiritual Teaching here. I am stopping at these three. Not because I am hungry. I think I have lost my appetite right now. It will come back. I simply need to breathe, center and breathe some more.

I shared a lot tonight and I feel it's very worthy stuff for us all. I'll stop here and I won't even google… what's a better word for 'stuff' lol

3 out of 5 is not bad if you knew I'd been doing serious yard-work all day without eating much.

I may go have a good cry. That, I have discovered, is the ultimate letting-go tool. I didn't cry for over a decade. Like in the movie The Holiday with Cameron Diaz when she couldn't cry if she tried. Yep, that was me. It's not healthy. At all!

I went from crying to truly weeping. There is a difference for me. My truth anyway. I literally can feel and taste the difference in tears when I am honestly weeping out something that no longer serves me. Some past trauma or toxicity. It's my truth to tell you it's healthier but through the practice of weeping, almost whenever I feel it coming on… my Blood Pressure has dropped my stress levels are down and I feel lighter. I'd be curious to know about the different chemical content in tears based on emotion. I bet there are studies out there.

It's as if the sutras of clinging have been cut and all the stitching together of past wounds I've held inside for decades flows out with the weeping. Unraveling their hold, forever leaving my body to live free and be me. So cry, weep… let go. Untie those knots, let the stitches unravel. We don't need to cling to all this "stuff" we are hanging onto.

Aren't you tired of holding onto it? I am.

Goodnight guys, Until tomorrow.

©️copyright 2017 Artemis On Fire

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